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I am currently taking extended medical health leave. I hope to return to work in 2015 but it’s looking like 2016. Thanks so much for your support and understanding as I deal with my health issues privately. Perhaps when I’m feeling better I’ll communicate more about it but right now I need as much rest and private time as possible. Thank you!


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22 thoughts on “Join my Mailing List!

  1. I just wanted to say thank you. You have written the very best article I have ever seen on coping with chronic disorganization, and it’s possible connection to Personality, intelligence, and lifestyle.
    Your respect, concern and intelligence is so clear, and your writing style is so empathetic, inspirational, and a huge help by itself.

    I wish you the very best in dealing with your health problems, and will be rooting for you.

  2. Pingback: Where do I start? 12 Ways to Get Unstuck, Decide Where to Start and Agilize What’s Bothering You | Ariane Benefit, M.S.Ed

  3. Pingback: Agilizing Your Mind: Unlearning Clutter Producing Thinking Habits | Ariane Benefit, M.S.Ed

  4. Hi there my name is kelly

    i am 29 have a little girl of 7. i’ve had a traumatic up bringing. i never understood why i felt the way i did growing up – i knew something wasnt right with me.

    from a young age i used to hold my head and hit it crying to my mum whats “wrong with my head it doesnt work properly.”

    ive always been an outcast or the clown – eager to please – attention seeker – used to make up storys to get it.

    my mum was embarrassed to take me anywhere. i was always into things i shouldnt of been my mums motto was “if u cant hear kelly then shes up to something she shouldnt be.”

    my family looked at me as a troublesome child i was nearly permanently expelled from junior school and senior school. from there went to college, got thrown out – never really realising how bad i must of been behaving.

    been sacked or lost complete interest in jobs i could never keep. as ive grown up ive found it hard to except how my family treated me through out my childhood. i have a strong belief that i have undiagnosed adhd but now im an adult its harder to get it diagnosed.

    but the reason why i cant just let it go like most undiagnosed adhd is as u get older u learn to deal with it but its still affecting a huge part of my life and thats organization and being disorganised around my house now

    its not that my house is dirty but its more to do with clothes clutter clutter

    ive limited space but any space corners draws cupboards shed bedside etc

    and is literally driving me to despair. its causing significant problems for me as a woman and drives my long term partner bonkers as he is a complete clean clutter free freak.

    its putting a lot of added pressure to our relationship but he cant understand how i find it so hard to put and keep things in their appropriate places.

    letters piled in draws amongst other little bits. clothes ironed in cupboard hanging up

    oh please help me i hate the way im living but just dont know where to look first and who best to seek for advice.

    also is there anyone or anyway you know how i can finally get closure of my reason to explain why i was the way i was and why im finding easy everyday chores or organising nearly impossible?

    please i think you can help solve my problems that prevent me living a happy social NORMAL Life!!

    yours truly grateful kelly

  5. Nine years ago I lost my husband and love of my life. Four years later I remarried and he was killed the day after the funeral. On top of already being high strung and ADHD I now had severe grief and PTSD. Everything just fell apart. Then the adult children with children took turns moving in and out. The piles grew and grew. This is the first time in a long time that I feel like I might have a chance of living a normal life again.

  6. We have 4 rental properties which we have had a accountant for many, many year’s, up until last year. Last year, she received a large account and stopped doing single peoples tax returns! I use to just take every receipt to her, she would figure out EVERYTHING and all we would have to do is sign and mail them into the I.R.S., now, it is 9-13, the taxes for 2012 have still not been done! I am totally over whelmed! I have tried & tried to find some thing on line to use to use to keep track of records and know where we stand & what to turn in at the end of the year. I even bought one of those NEAT ORGINISERS (It came with NO directions on how to use it) when I contacted them to tell them about the problem, they acted like I was crazy! I feel like I am at this time. These taxes should have been turned in this PAST April 15th and they are still sitting here staring at me! This has just about got the best of me! We went to other accountants and they ALL just want finial numbers! There are HUNDREDS of receipts, and things needed to file these taxes that I do not even know where to look for the information at! I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO!!! I AM ABOUT TO LOOSE MY MIND, DO YOU HAVE ANY SUJUSTIONS? If you do I would GREATLY appreciate it so much, words could not say! Thank you so much for your time. Even a web-site I that gives a record keeping system would help, if it is one for rental homes. I cant find one, believe me, I have searched, & searched!!!
    Shirley Ziepfel

    • What a tough situation! I can’t “advise” you, but I can say I’m stunned your accountant would drop you without giving you a referral to a bookeeper and accountant who could help you. Sounds like you need someone with bookeeping skills – perhaps try a temp agency for a personal assistant or a college student studying to become a CPA (I worked as a part time bookeeper while in college, it was great!)

      I have written about taxes and financial paper work here: It may not address your needs exactly but I hope you find some ideas in there to customize to your situation. Good Luck!

  7. I look forward to getting help in organizing my home office. I have a soon to be 2 year old and manage 25 properties some of which are our own and others are clients. I also do the cleaning and repairing of some properties. With a very bad back and my joints failing every bit of help is needed to keep our family business running smoothly.

  8. As a person with a medical background, including a Master’s Degree, this was confirming. I always said, “Whatever I have, my Grandma had it, my mom has it, I have it, and my daughter has it 10 times worse than all of us.

    She is unable to maintain her living space since her teens and is now age 31. She now lives back in my home on the lower level and has hired me to clean because she gets overwhelmed and I got upset.

    Why? the accumulation of un-rinsed dishes “decorating” the whole space, mounds of clothes on the floor (laundered mixed with the dirty), and my tool and storage sheds no longer navigable since she moved in a year ago. She cannot get past Yoga I in college; cannot maintain a job so takes temp work; cannot maintain close relationships so has many friends whom she is generous with but they exploit her; she is in financial distress and worked one whole year without being paid because unable to focus on submitting the paperwork; and family gets upset when she shows up for family events when they are half over.

    By going on a Hoarding website, I see chromosome 14 deficits (decision-making) affect MANY parts of life, is part of the same syndrome, so to speak.

    I think I have found the answer I have been seeking. Once there is a label, there is understanding and compassion. Finally, we can go down the correct path to get the appropriate resources in place, and achieve better coping for the rest of OUR lives. Today, thanks to you & God, I have HOPE.

    • Thanks so much for writing and letting me know how the toolkit is helping you deal with your challenges. Decision-making affects EVERY part of life. People like us need to learn how to make decisions in a completely different way than the average person does. Conventional approaches to decision-making are likely to make the situation even worse. One of the mantras in my AgiliZen framework is “Design for Decision-making” and it turns conventional decision-making inside out. I’m working on the book…but in the meantime you can read more articles on my website here.

  9. Ariane,
    I had the pleasure of listening to you on the Unschooling Summit today. What a wonderful bit of information you shared. Thank you so much for doing so! I look forward to reading the toolkit.

  10. I discovered you when surfing the web to find out why I, an intelligent, successful person, keeps getting “in trouble” at work for poor organizational skills. AH ha! Can you help my INTP self get a little more organized in a way that satisfies the boss and co-workers but doesn’t feel onerous and unnatural? Many thanks!

    • Thanks so much for your note Wendy! What you describe is definitely a big part of my work with people. Working to manage expectations and negotiate the balance between “their” needs and yours. If you are interested in personal coaching with me, you can contact me via my website, or hang in there until I’m ready to offer another group program. All my best,


  11. Thank you! For the first time ever (I’m 43) I have found someone/something that describes me. I love Jesus-most important element in my life. I just appreciate knowing that you are helping others who feel awkward in normal situations because of their out-of-the-box thinking (myself anyway). Agility is a beautiful word with great meaning. I thank you for opening your mind & heart even more so the rest of us can see the light through this long tunnel. I know it’s possible to get organized the way I can do it. I have a wonderful brain that can’t wait to work this out. I am very willing; I just want to get away from this frozen state of mind and on to an agile state of mind. God provides everything; He does want us to do the footwork though. The path along the way might just be a little more colorful and fun than the norm, but I am like that. God bless you richly, Ann Marie Smith

    • Thanks so much for sharing your note with me and letting me know how much this means to you. Your feedback and appreciation mean the world to me – It helps validate that we are not alone and that it’s really worth the trouble to try bring the tribe together to understand ourselves in whole way. Knowing you are out there helps me keep going when the going gets tough. Thank you again! I really needed to hear your message today!

  12. Pingback: The Truth about Chronic Disorganization: Understanding What Causes Chronic Disorganization and How to Heal the Trauma of Lifelong Disorganization, Overwhelm and Frustration | Ariane Benefit, M.S.Ed

  13. Pingback: Easy Button – Attention Management and Shifting Perspective | Ariane Benefit, M.S.Ed

  14. Pingback: Suggested Resources for Getting Started in the Shift to Agility and Design Thinking | Ariane Benefit, M.S.Ed

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